"When the sea erodes the cliffs, large rocks fall away and into the sea. These rocks are tossed about by the action of the sea and they are eroded into smaller and smaller pebbles. The pebbles are eventually ground down into the tiny grains of sand that form a beach."
-British Broadcasting Television Bitesize: Geography
A few days ago, I found a significantly large-sized pebble. I began to wonder about its journey and remembered briefly a geography fact I learned years ago about how beaches are formed. My purpose is not to give a geology lesson, but to show how earth's science activated a few musings that stirred within me while holding that magnificent rock.
How was it that I came to find you? Of all the standard-sized pebbles, I found the largest rock that took (covered) the entire palm of my hand. I had gone to the beach to take photographs with a dear friend and there it was. Massively gorgeous, no flaws and, as my friend would attest to it, I logged it around during our entire time at La Jolla Shores.
Little did I know that the rock would help me clarify a few things that I had experienced the weekend before. The opening caption above describes the journey of a rock into fine beach sand, constantly washing away, or is it really? As I watched the sea rush in after every wave, it came to me: such is life!
"If people realized that the journey of a rock is similar to life, relationships would be different."
This pebble started as a chip from a cliff and traveled harshly, constantly being beaten by nature until it became a polished piece. I thought about my interactions with others to be like this and realized that the relationships I hold dear always had a rocky start. They were not perfect at the beginning because you are simply discovering one another.
The more you reveal your true nature to another, the harsher the grind. But there is a point when calm takes over. It is when you see how wonderful that person is. This is just for you only to see sometimes and in your interactions with them, you freely show how you regard them. It needs no words or affirmations. This is the power of love, in its purest form.
As I held that pebble in my hand, I realized the greatest friendships I hold dear and how I wanted to move forward from that point on. To preserve that pebble and not leave it to the elements to become sand, constantly being washed away. Beautiful on the surface but no solidity.
So dear reader, I ask you about that torrid relationship, be it family, friend, colleague or lover. Some will grind to sand. However, you can seek out better ones that can form into solid rocks? Then, you can truly build a wall or brick road!
Photo credit: Iris Knightley Moments
Naturally, I took a photo of the rock to remind me of the recognitions I came to that afternoon. Even my lovely friend was not aware what was going on in my soul but I am happy to count her as one of my rocks, still rough around the edges but solid inside. I want to thank all who crossed my mind that day and still do as I look at this photo. Your love has helped me build a solid path to not only discovering but becoming my true self.
Build relationships that are solid as a rock, that can stand the harsh currents of life as well as the dark choices we make, that ARE unbreakable. Make a note to self that footprints in someone’s life that can be washed away like beach sand, are not enough. Let love (not merely selective fondness) be a solid force in your interactions always.
written by Adesola Akindele
February 2017
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